To bring the story up to date, I'll write about what's been happening between S and our vanilla single-dad neighbor fellow since last year. Which is: not much - until recently.
It's about time I gave him a name, so henceforth he will be known as Ethan.
After S told Ethan our little secret, things seemed to be progressing; they were hanging out, chatting, flirting, and discussing the possibility of a sexual relationship. Then he got a bit weird about it, like he didn't really 'get' or accept what was being offered (and, crucially, what
wasn't ...
vanilla guy):
leggysandy wrote: ↑Sat May 04, 2024 11:09 pm
So, an update... I had a long long chat with my handsome, tall neighbor last night (messaging). And wow, the things he has said. Unlike year ago, he seems to want to do it, but he doesn't want to do it under "my" rules as he calls it. He doesn't want it to be super secret, he doesn't want to be careful about what he says and does in public and he doesn't want to actively try to hide it.
So, he says that it would be natural to share with his friends if he was dating a new woman and I tried to explain that this would not be dating. You don't just come to your friend and say: hey, I am having sex with this woman. And btw, she's married and her husband is on board!
I said the only way to do it is if he learns how to be private about it. And he said that I could learn how not to be married, or how to be more open about who I am seeing. He still wants to meet, even if just for a chat, and seems like he want to meet me half way, as in find some compromise.
I think this is pretty much dead end and we can try negotiating year from now again
leggysandy wrote: ↑Fri Jul 19, 2024 10:06 am
While ago I exchanged few more messages with him. He basically said something that this could have been great if I wasn't so secretive about it, but I told him that with both of us having kids of similar age in same village, I simply cannot understand that point of view. It's like he wanted to impose some of his rules because he doesn't want to follow "my" rules, even though they are here to protect us and our families. He told me he hasn't mentioned anything to anyone and that this whole "thing" will stay between us, but I basically completely stepped away and we are back to normal relationship where we only communicate about kids and school and stuff like that. He is just not the right person, and best to leave it at that.
And with that, the subject seemed closed. But come November, Ethan seemed to be angling to get himself back into contention. At least, that seemed obvious to me. When our other friends who know about our lifestyle came over for NYE, they agreed. S was still brushing it off at that point. But within days, he was asking her out.
They chatted, and Ethan said something like he "didn't know what he was thinking" previously. He 'gets' it now. He wants it. He doesn't want to disturb our family life in any way. He wants to have sex with my wife. And importantly, she still really wants that too.
They've been out on dates to the pub, and the cinema, and he has gradually become more daring with touching her, etc. He tells her, "you're so tiny!" He seems particularly fond of her legs, and bum, which he loves to squeeze. But it's been
slow. He said he needed to take it slow, and that she could date someone else if she wanted more
action. We joked that he's like a virginal teenage girl. Amusingly, he even made the same joke ("I feel like I'm a 16 year old girl, and you're a 19 year old boy"). To be fair, he's had a rough time since his ex left, without even saying goodbye to the children. He had to tell them that Mummy's not coming back. His ex now has 50% custody, but he's been celibate for 4 years.
The last few times they've got together, she's gone over to his house. Things kept getting slightly warmer between them, but he still hadn't even
kissed her. He would make like he was going to kiss her, and then back off. This bothered her, and last week she called it off. She re-booked the social date with the guy from the dating site. Ethan was sad; remorseful. She popped over to his house briefly to chat, as "just friends". You know where this is going. There was the usual touching and canoodling, and she ended up straddling him on the couch, and there was some grinding. Still no kiss, but getting warmer. She came home extremely horny, and was molesting me for the next 2 days. She really wants this guy. She gets very wet thinking about him.
This past Tuesday, she had her social date, but it was a flop. Wednesday, she again dropped in to visit Ethan at home, and ... breakthrough! There was kissing (she rates him a good kisser - very important!) and lots of touching, though the clothes stayed on. He said he wanted her naked. S reckons that if she hadn't had to get back home, he would have taken her to bed then and there.
Which brings us to tonight. She's heading over after the kids are in bed. She does not have to get back home. She can stay out late
.
I agree, she has a very level head, and handles everything really well. I'm not positive I could do the same, if the roles were reversed. I married well! (for lots of reasons)
So far ... so good! Fingers crossed for something new happening pretty soon.PlayboyFan wrote: ↑Wed Dec 11, 2024 1:18 pmHere’s hoping she has as much luck as my Hottie has had and more!
It probably won't happen with that guy now. Partly because she's worried that he has small equipment (!) and partly because ...
He is going away on holiday next week, which will be a bummer if nothing else happens between now and then.